Facebook Status
by eatingpaper
Summary: Lovino Vargas, dared by his brother to set his FB status as:'Like this and I will post on your Wall every day for a week', expects no one to do so. But he wasn't counting on the creepy-stalker-lovely farmhand from the tomato farm in Spain.
1. Tuesday

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia; Mister HH does.

PFT. I don't even know what this is. But here's a quick (cracky, nonsense) story before this authoress goes off to a village up in the hills in Thailand~!

Inspired by two of my friends, who bonded over the same status-dare on Facebook.

I know Facebook uses 'See Friendship' now, but it's so stupid. 'Wall-to-Wall' sounds _so _much better.

And this is sort of in present tense, so that's why the posts you read first don't correspond with the time of the posts you read later on in the chapter.

Okay.

And I used 'Lovino'! I still prefer 'Romano', but Lovino seems to fit this story more. Anyhooo -

* * *

"_Fratello! I dare you to do this!" _

**Like this and I will post on your Wall every day for a week.**

Even though his brother was an ineffectual douchebag, a dare was a dare and Lovino Vargas _never _backed down from a dare, no matter how fucking stupid or dumb it was. _Because he would always win_.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas Like this and I will post on your Wall every day for a week.  
**9:48pm · Like · Comment

But really! Not only did it make Lovino seem like an attention seeking teenage girl, it also highlighted the fact that he had not that many friends on _Facebook_ who would thumbs-up on his fucking status.

Oh. There's one!

Trying hard not to break out in a – reluctant – smile, Lovino checked the person who had 'liked' his status: Anita Fernandez Carriedo. The profile picture featured a beautifully tanned girl with long, curly locks and emerald green eyes and a broad smile, holding up a basket of tomatoes. He stared longer and harder at the tomatoes than the girl.

"Fuck!" Lovino got up and padded to the kitchen to grab one of those delicious red fruits. As he munched on his snack, he pondered over the se – _strange _girl who had responded to the status; he had no recollection of befriending any Spanish (her profile said) girl…

Unless it was the too-fucking-talkative farmhand on the tomato farm that he had visited with Feliciano a few years back. He grimaced at how Anita had chattered on and on endlessly about tomatoes and the farming techniques and how cute he was – and how he looked like one when he blushed like that!

Cursing his fate, Lovino typed a few words onto her Wall. He deleted the message. A lady was a lady no matter what. Even if said girl was a creepy-stalker-obsessed-over-him-wrong-in-the-head lady.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Ciao! This is the first of the posts. So, I'm Lovino Vargas, pleased to meet you.**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

The reply came seconds later.

**Anita F.C.: **Lovino Vargas~! I missed you so much over the past few years! Do you still remember me?**  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Just 'Lovino' will do, thank you. Of course I remember the beautiful (here he coughed) girl at the tomato farm.**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Ah, you do? Buhyoo, I'm so happy! You never answered my earlier messages so I thought you'd forgotten about me or something TT3TT but good thing you haven't! Lovino~! How have you been?**  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**What earlier messag – **no

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **I've been doing fine, thank you.**  
**Just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Should he mention the restaurant he and Feliciano had set up? What sort of expression was 'buhyoo'? He wanted to end the conversation and go take a shower to wash off the food odors.

**Anita F.C.: **The crop this year has been good, but last year… last year was terrible we hardly managed to gather 10 baskets! DDD: boss wasn't very happy, but he's never been a happy man, but he was very happy when you and your brother came around to visit us! How is your brother, is he doing good too?**  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** I see. My brother is doing good, too.**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Feliciano, right? Ah, he's so cute! Just like you! But you're cuter~**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino promptly fetched another tomato to munch on to calm his rapid heartbeat.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **T-thank you.**  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **You're welcome~ Are you coming back to visit us ~ I've got a new tank of turtles ~~ they would L3VE to say hello to you! :D**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

The chat alert went off, and the little box popped up at the bottom of Lovino's screen.

* * *

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **Ve, fratello! Youve made a fwend~

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Shut up

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **And it's a very, very pretty girl two :3

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY, FELI.

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **Ve? Getting angry over nothing, fratello~

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **w-what?

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **It's okay, fratello~ you cn fly over to spain 'nytime you waaant

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **STFU.

He x-ed the conversation and turned to the accumulating wall posts on his page, courtesy of an enthusiastic, worried Anita.

* * *

**Anita F.C.: **We can go walk in the tomato fields together!**  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **like in my dream!**  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Loviiiiii~!**  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **LoviiiiI~?**  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **did I scare you away?**  
**3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **I'm so sorry, Lovi!**  
**3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **NUU LOVI COME BAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **LOVI.**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **DON'T**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **LEAVE**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **STFU**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **ME**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **D:**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** LANGUAGE, LOVI, LANGUAGE. FOR ALL THE POST YOU MUS NOT USE VULGARITYS**  
**10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **MUST NOT* USE VULGARITIES***  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **TOO BAD. I'M NOT DOING THIS SHIT.**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He went to get another tomato and nibbled on it, anxious – not he was _not_ fucking anxious, damn it! He was just waiting for the stupid girl to get the message into her thick skull and then leave him alone.

Yeah. That was it.

A few minutes passed, and yet no new posts appeared on his wall. Lovino was just about to close the webpage, _smirking_, when the fucking alert popped up.

**Anita F.C.: **It's not very becoming for a man to back out of his word, is it?**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

_Fuck._

He went to get another tomato.

Just six more days, six more days of this annoying as hell interaction, and then he would be free.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **fine. Fuck it . I'd do this fucking shit . _just _so I can show that idiotic brother of mine.**  
**5 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Good boy! And remember, no swear words, okay?**  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Yeah yeah whatever.**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

* * *

**Anita F.C: **YAY IT WORKED!**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Feli, you're a genius!**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **HEHE . I'm not his brother for nothing you know~**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Si, si.**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **and fratello needs a girlfriend badly): he seems nicer over the internet, right?**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Ahaha. He's very cute~ *w* So, how is your manly, German girl going?**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **/blush**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT? FELICIANO, YOU - !**  
**5 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **/runds to hide**  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **... tomato..? :3**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

* * *

**Lovino Fucking Vargas is fucking dying. **  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment

**Anita F.C.: **NUUU LOVI, DON"T DIE ON MEEE**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **STFU. I'M GOING TO SLEEP.**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **goodnight Lovi! here's a goodnight kiss~**  
**moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino shut down his computer and tottered off to bed; he couldn't handle the growing headache he had gotten from just communicating with that weird, overly cheerful Spanish girl via Facebook wall posts.

But, a small part of his brain slipped in, since he had to talk to her for a whole week, maybe he could get to know her better?

Yeah, right. As if he wanted to familiarize himself with that creepy-sexy-as-shit-stalker-too-cheerful woman.

Who knows? That small part of his mind countered, a lot can happen in a week.

Fuck off.

And he fell asleep, dreaming of tomatoes and sunshine and a tanned girl laughing by his side.

* * *

is there a time difference in Spain and Italy? Well. Maybe. this was all rushed. it's less than perfect. when i come back i'll edit it. maybe.

or just scrap it.


	2. Wednesday

Here's a quick update before I fly off later on today!

I think...this is worse than the previous chapter. oh well !

But your reviews were so kind so I decided to continue this. To be honest, it was only intended to be a oneshot, and I didn't expect _that _many people to like it, **THANK YOU SO MUCH!**

So anyway, it's going to be about 14 chapters (YEAH HAHA) since me, being me, complicated the plot like no tomorrow. ... not _really _, but something like that.

I hope you enjoy~

Disclaimer: Axis Powers Hetalia does not belong to me; it belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. 

* * *

Lovino threaded the chain through the doors' handles, padlocking them and slipping the key into his pocket. He tugged hard on the lock to make sure it was secure. Satisfied, he started on the walk home.

The night air was chilly, and the man crossed his arms over his chest in an effort to keep himself warm. He cursed his stupid younger brother with each step; Feliciano had skipped work in favour of going on a date with his stupid potato-bastard girlfriend, leaving Lovino to work doubly hard in the kitchen _and _walk home alone. Not that his brother was much of company, just that it would be ni – would mean less time spent with his fucking _German _girlfriend. Who didn't seem much like a girl, in Lovino's opinion; Liesel was more like a fucking _man, _with her tall build and tousled short blonde hair and stiff mannerisms. He preferred more…womanly women, with curves and curls and a lilting smile…

Like Anita…

Oh fuck, no, he did _not _just think that – and no, her face did _not _just come to mind!

Too bad, you did, the voice in his head said smugly.

Lovino was graciously spared from a redundant argue with his own mind when his handphone beeped.

_From: Fratello (the fucking bastard)_

_Message: CIAO, MIO FRATELLO! RMEBMER TO POST ON SIGNORA ANITA'S WALL TONIGHT! ALRIGHT, I'M GOING TO GO SLEEP – DID YOU KNOW LIESCHEN IS GOING TO ACT IN A NEW DRAMA? I CAN'T WAIT TO SE HER ON TV AGAIN! SEE THIS IS THE KIND OF HAPINESS YO GET WHEN YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIED SO YOU WORK HARD OKAAY? SI SI SI? :DDDD BUONANOTTE~ _

Lovino stared at the message for five seconds, eyebrow twitching. He contemplated running over to 'Lieschen's' house to inflict some sort of pain on his fucktard of a brother. Then he remembered that Gillian, the potato-bastard's albino, extremely obnoxious elder sister was staying with them, and decided she was enough to annoy the shit out of the couple.

Mood generally lightened, he continued on his way and soon arrived at his house. He unceremoniously took off his clothes as he made his way to the bathroom, eager to enjoy a long, relaxing bath before braving the undulating task that lay before him.

**Anita F.C.: **¡hola, Lovi! Today is the 2nd day! and **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: ** i have something to tel lyou! :DDD you know what happened today? **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Lovi, gues gues guess~ **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Lovi! Oh I knwo! You'r walking home right now right!**  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **i'm so smart! Hooray  
2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **i just went to read the thing i was going to tell you about just now! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **its super, super goooood~ when are you reaching home? I want to tell you :3 **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **it has something to do with tomatoesss  
1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **mmph. I think you are bathing right now! So I will waaait  
1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **let's play a game while i wait! see who can keep quiet the longest :D uno, dos, tres! Empieza!**  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino stared at his Wall, flooded with posts from the Spanish woman. He wondered if she had hit her head when she was a baby…Smi –_ scowling_, he went to get a tomato to munch on.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Ciao, Anita. This is your second wall post. Goodnight.**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **AHAH! LOVI! YOU LOST THE GAME! **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

What the –?

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** What fucking game? **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **The game to see who can keep quiet the longest! Yay I won! **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Trust his brother to find a woman who acted like a five year old kid for him – n-not like he was _considering _dating Anita, no! What was wrong with his brain today…

**Anita F.C.: **YAY LOVI, YOU'RE RESPONDING TO ME.!**  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Aanyway lovi~ I've missed you so much! Why do you take so long to go home? D: **  
**2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **ah I remembered the thing I wanted to tell yoU! **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **so. Today, the ….  
1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **DUN DUN DUN~ DRUM ROOLL~ **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **the  
about a minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **TOMATO 3 **  
**about a minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **SEED**  
**about a minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **CATALOUGE **  
**about a minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **CAME!**  
**10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: ** :3 3 3 3 **  
**1 second ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino arched an eyebrow. He – he was just sceptical of the Spaniard's excitement. Yeah, that was it, not that he was interested in the catalogue himself.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** What is that? Your fucking porn? **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**An****ita F.C.: **EW LOVI, NO. ): I told you no vulgairites. **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **you have to restart if you use any swear words :/ **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** No thanks, I'd rather not. **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **good boy!  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **oh, and today we planted a whole new row of tomato saplings! I cant wait for them to grow up~!  
10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **if you came back, we could go tomato harvesting together~ like the last time :3  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino could remember the trip to the tomato farm three years ago, when his brother and him were sourcing out good suppliers for their restaurant. Anita had thrust a huge wicker basket into his arms and dragged him out to harvest tomatoes. He didn't admit it then – nor would he ever – that the experience had been enjoyable, except for the train of turtles that had kept following the pair.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** That'd be nice. **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Wait. _What _the _fuck _did he just post?

**Anita F.C.: **! ¡Hurra! ¡Hurra! ¡Hurra! I can't wait to see you again, Lovi!  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Said Italian munched on his new tomato, staring at the screen with a mixture of shock and joy.

After a while of Anita gushing about what they would do when Lovino visited and Lovino's sarcastic comments, the Spanish lady announced that she was turning in; tomorrow she had to rise early to pack tomatoes for sale in the market. Lovino glanced at the computer's clock; it read 11:03 pm. He was surprised, he hadn't realized the conversation with Anita had lasted nearly an hour.

**Anita F.C.: ** Buenas noches, Lovi  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** B..buonanotte. **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: ** (: lessthanthree  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He polished off a couple more tomatoes before he went to bed.

* * *

**A/N: **oh right, before you people say anything, the mistakes in Anita's posts are not accidental. In my mind, she's so excited about talking to her one true love that she's completely disregarding her spelling. haha. yeah. and the random '3's that appear in her posts are supposed to be 'less than three's, but FF . Net doesn't allow them, unfortunately. ):

kthxbye.


	3. Thursday

Happy New Year to you all! Haha, I'm quite late with this, and this is a kind of rushed/sucky chapter, sorry!

But I'm totally swamped with homework (because I'm as lazy as Romano) and school's back the day after tomorrow. ):

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, except for Albert; Hidekaz Himaruya does. I only own Albert and a few witty comments. I don't claim to be any expert in tomatoes, either. So I'm sorry if cherry tomatoes and Campari tomatoes can't grow in the same farm. 

Here you go, a chapter in Anita's point of view. I'm not so good at writing her yet heehee.

Thanks to : **CheesyFursona , Life's Shadows , lovetemashika , CalaveraCandiedSkull , Lumoa (you seem familiar...) , KidOtaku94 , Moomoogirl1 , Kale Henderson , pi-or-pie (you seem familiar too) , Kibacoe ** for reviewing. And to you all who alerted, too(:

And. HOMIGOSH. I got _**FANART.**_ I can_not_ describe how blown away, honoured and exhilarated I am. Like, wth? It's drawn by the wonderful lovetemashika (: lovetema on dA .

GASP. still . cannot . comprehend .

And because she keeps on hinting at me, I suppose this chapter is for lovetemashika (:

And a cookie to whoever guesses who Albert is. It's kind of obvious, though. Hee.

* * *

"Hello! Care to buy some bananas and potatoes?"

"Morning! Take a look at these fine bunches of grapes!"

"Juicy apples and sweet pears for sale!"

Anita hummed to herself as she set up her stall, arranging the tomatoes tenderly into shallow wooden crates by their type, tilting the crates a little to display the beautiful fruit to potential customers.

"Hello! How much for a few tomatoes?" the brunette's head shot up and she faced the speaker with a broad smile. Standing in front of her stall was a lithe girl with a curly blonde bob, looking out of place in the hustle and bustle of the market in her fancy sundress and red hair band. Her lips curled up in her trademark smile, last seen a year ago and still reminiscent of the ':3' emote.

"Clara!" Anita greeted her friend with a hug, though both girls' ample chests prevent it to be a tight one. When they pulled apart, Anita noticed the dark-haired man standing beside Clara, sticking out like a sore thumb in a dress suit. She gave Clara an enquiring look, causing the girl to blush lightly.

"Anita, this is Albert," Clara gestured to the man, who dipped his head gently. "And Albert, this is Anita, my sexy Spanish friend I was telling you about." Anita, who apparently had no qualms about being introduced as 'sexy Spanish friend', greeted Albert with a cheery 'Hola!', which he returned.

Clara paced along the store, staring at the crates of tomatoes, randomly picking plump fruits up to scrutinize. "Which one taste the best…?" she asked pathetically after a few minutes. Anita laughed and started her detailed and informative descriptions about the different types of tomatoes she had on sale.

"See these small ones? They're called Campari tomatoes, and are really sweet and juicy. You can tell them apart from cherry tomatoes – these ones over here – by their deep red colour and larger size – though not as large as a Roma tomato – and then they can be used in a variety of ways, such as in pasta…"

* * *

Anita stumbled into her small room and collapsed onto the bed, utterly exhausted. After selling majority of her wares at the market (she was known for having the best tomatoes – and well-liked for her friendly attitude) and entertaining Clara and Albert for an hour or two, she had returned to the farm to work in the fields with the other three farmhands before cooking dinner for her boss (not that she minded; she loved cooking). The exhaustion was unfamiliar to Anita; having worked at the farm for almost her entire life, she had gotten used to the long hours and back-breaking work…though yesterday she _had _slept at near midnight and woken at the crack of dawn.

Anita's eyes shot open, all exhaustion suddenly flung off. She sat up quickly and jumped onto the chair by her small desk, turning on her laptop as if her life depended on it.

**Anita F.C. is back at the farm~!**  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Ciao senorita Anita **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Just seeing those words made her heart soar.

**Anita F.C.: **Lovi!  
1 second ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Aren't you supposed to be at work now?  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **it's only around nine-ish now .  
5 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **YOU DIDNT KSIP WORK TODAY DID YO U?  
10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She could just imagine Lovino wrinkling his nose in contempt. Or disgust. Or something like that. But hey, love is blind and blind people don't notice spelling mistakes.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Well, today we were supposed to have a new batch of tomatoes coming, but since fratello is so fulousy at choosing tomatoes, I went instead. **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita couldn't help but giggle at the misspelled word; she was thrilled that Lovino was actually listening to her about not having any vulgarities.

**Anita F.C.: **Really? today I spent my morning selling tomatoes1!**  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **like I told you last night  
58 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **I'm so tired nooooww  
30 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **but there was goood business!  
24 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Oh**  
**10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **but what do you know about tomatoes, then?  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** …not much…but enough to know a cherry tomato from a Roma and those two from a Campari and a grape tomato …**  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Oh, she could just imagine Lovino blushing like a tomato now! It was maddening how adorable he could be. Smiling slyly, she quickly typed a response.

**Anita F.C.: **dou you know how to tell if a mr. stripey is ripe or now?  
3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** ..No.  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita giggled at the mental image of Lovino sourly glaring at his computer screen.

**Anita F.C.: **hee hee! I could teech you, when you come over.  
3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **when are you coming yover?  
3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **come over sooooon  
3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **please? :D  
2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Maybe. No – no promises, though!  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **:3  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She was mimicking the emote.

**Anita F.C.: **oh , that reminds me that to taday I met an old friend of mine !  
2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **I think you know her ebecause she mentioned something about a pair of Italian twins with hair culrs like oyur cute one!  
2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **how is your restaurant going,  
1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **by the way?  
1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** How do you know about the restaurant?  
30 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** I never mentioned anything about any restaurant  
25 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Ah. Shoot. Anita nervously bit her lip trying to think of a way to answer Lovino's question without making the Italian angry. But then again, she'd never lied…

**Anita F.C.: **I've talked to your brother before  
about two minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **we've been talking to each other since you asked boss to come to our farm~ :D  
1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **he's very cute, you see.  
40 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **and then he tld me taht you weren't very good wth strangers  
30 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **nad that youtwo run a sort of famours restaurant  
10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **so. :D  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She watched as Lovino posted something, and then deleted it from her wall, too fast for her to catch what it had said. She furrowed her brow, wondering what was up with Lovino – oh no! What if Lovino took her words the wrong way, like Feliciano told her he might? What if Lovino thought she was only talking to him because of Feli's insistence – or because he owned a restaurant and was fairly well-off (due to a rich grandfather)?

**Anita F.C.: **but but! It doesn't mean anything ag all, Lovi!  
1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **it'sl not like I like feli or anything , really .  
58 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **and im not talkin to you because fel iasked me to  
40 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **or because your rich  
30 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **or because youre not good wit hstrangers, whatevet hat menas.  
20 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **and i did say that you're cuter than felI1!  
10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **LOVI, say something, please?  
just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Why don't you just go and talk to Feliciano instead?  
seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She stared at the screen, feeling like she had made the situation even worse with her frantic typing. But she really wasn't to blame; she might just _die _if Lovino stopped talking to her.

**Feliciano loves PASTA: ** Ve, Anitina! What did you say to fratello? **  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA: **he's sending me smses about killing me and me interfering with his life and not bothering him (like I do!) ever again! And how my taste in women is bad. (which ISNT) **  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA: ** Lieschen saw them and she's not ve… very happy ): **  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **I..i said something careless, I guess. I told him the two of us have been talking for the past three years and he … took it the wrong way ?  
about 4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **but – but I didn't mean anything bad!  
3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **and he's not responding to me.! DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:  
about 3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **FELI D: you know how much I love him!  
2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA:** Ve…I'll see what I can do, okay? **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita breathed a sigh of relief, though the anxiety was still lodged in her chest. She threw herself down and buried her face into her pillow, breathing in the scent of tomatoes. She would do anything, even message – no, _call _Lovino to apologize and beg for forgiveness, but she didn't know his number.

"Argh!" Anita groaned, cursing herself. Feliciano had told her that she was honestly good at heart and did care for his brother – but she was too scatterbrained for her own good. "Or too talkative," Anita murmured into her pillow. She sighed and decided she would try to talk to Lovino the next day… after he had some time to calm down.

* * *

**A/N: **Roma's so touchy! And _way _too paranoid/sensitive. And kind of mean, coming from Anita's perspective. /wrinkles brow. That's precisely why a friend of mine doesn't like Romano at all D: she keeps on asking me what I see in that guy. But birds of a feather flock together. :D One of the reasons why I love Romano so much is probably because he's most like me out of all the Hetalia characters. With added bits from Feli and Luddy and Roddy and Gilbo and Eliza and well, you know :D

and on a side note, where do you think Lovi and Anita should live? I was toying with the idea of Anita living in the Canary Islands ( La Laguna, Tenerife) since they produce a lot of tomatoes and I couldn't find any other place on Wiki that exported tomatoes. Lovi living in Rome? Or Naples. Or Sicily. But there's no online translator for Sicilian or Neapolitan ): (i'm just really weird) And if anything in the story seems off, it's okay. It's a work of fiction. But I try, I try. Do apples and pears grow on Tenerife? /headdesk


	4. Friday

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia - Axis Powers. There's a reason why it's called 'Fanfiction' 

Ehheeh. I'm so sorry! It's been more than a week...and school is back in full swing with homework and tests and exams and whatnot.

This chapter is kind of short and lacking and rushed so I apologize.

Thank you all you lovely readers / alerters / favouriters. :D I go all Anita over you.

* * *

Lovino, on other days, would be his usual self: foul-mouthed and snarky comments and sarcastic. Lovino, on _other _other days, like today, was even more so, with middle-fingers flying everywhere and all pleasantries thrown out the window.

"Fuck _off,_ fucktard," Lovino spat, yanking his brother's arms from around his waist and raising the frying pan threateningly. He had been doing fine, cooking in the kitchen as normal (albeit violently) when his idiotic, sorry excuse for a brother had entered – no, _flown _in to the kitchen, and latched himself onto Lovino while wailing apologies and explanations for last night's incident along with chiding.

Feliciano, Lovino quickly realized, was pretty amazingly strong and determined when he put his mind to it. Like how he had, for the past hour, tried to explain to Lovino that "_no, Anita's not __talking to you out of pity" _or_ "no, I didn't tell Anita to talk to you" or "no, Anita's not after nonno's money" or "no – _well, you get the idea. But Lovino obviously didn't.

He _didn't_ care. B_e_cause all his life he had always known that he wasn't half as important as Feliciano, even more useless than him and constantly overshadowed by his younger, bubblier and more adorable and social brother. Therefore, it did not come as a surprise to him that Feliciano had taken _his_ social life into hishands and set up connections for_ him_. Like he needed them! Chigi!

_Interfering, bothering fucktard!_ Lovino grumbled to himself as he waved Feliciano off with the frying pan. It didn't matter that Feliciano had been communicating with Anita since eons ago, or that Feliciano had made the entire interaction between Anita and him possible. Or that Anita was merely pitying him or doing Feliciano a favour, or that the girl was only after their grandfather's money and that Anita didn't really – wait, when had this become about Anita and not his annoying brother?

Lovino's momentary distraction provided Feliciano with the perfect chance to dispose of the frying pan (and other harmful kitchen implements) and pin him to a chair. Feliciano held his wrists together in a vice-like grip with a knee wedged beside Lovino's thigh to prevent his brother from escaping.

"F –" Was all Lovino managed to get out before Feliciano clamped a hand over his mouth and, for once, _opened his eyes and looked at Lovino._

_Fucking fuck, no wonder his eyes are always nearly closed, _Lovino thought as he withered before the gaze.

When Feliciano was sure there would be no more resistance, he smiled, the action made suddenly sinister. Even his voice lost its cheerful tone and adopted a creepier, more ominous edge.

"Well you see, brother Lovino, the thing is that senorita Anita is a very nice girl and she's very friendly and the two of us started talking, si, and if you haven't noticed, she's quite obsessed with you – something like a masochist, no?" Feliciano gave giggle at that (No, Lovino wasn't fucking scared of his brother! – and _where_ had Feli learnt that word?).

"It was probably due to the photographs of the Halloween when you dressed up as a tomato," That idea was his brother's stupid fucking idea, not his, damn it! "…But the thing is, you're not the most friendly person on earth," Lovino was tempted to snort at the comment, "And so Anita talked to me instead because I'm so much more adorable than you –" Lovino felt a tiny – _really _tiny pang in the chest at that comment.

"– really has no ulterior motive to talk to you – since she knew about the restaurant thing only on the last day of our visit – except for maybe making you fall – oops, sorry, can't say! But promise me you'll say sorry to Anita, okay? You really hurt her feelings, which is a big no-no for any gentleman – I've never hurt any of dear Lieschen's feelings before!"

His voice had returned to normal, but Feliciano continued to stare hard into his brother's eyes, as if he could transmit the message into the other's brain through fucking telepathy. Lovino, unable to tear his gaze away and still taken aback by his brother's sudden change in demeanor, wordlessly nodded.

The tense atmosphere was broken by an accented voice, "Ooh, brotherly love, how riveting, mind if I join in?" The blonde French saucier was gaily leaning against a nearby countertop with a seductive smile. Both brothers erupted in different greetings.

"Big brother Francis!"

"Get the fuck _away – the two of you__!_"

* * *

Bad manners or no, Lovino was a man true to his words; he never broke any promises or cheated on anyone, and when he got back from work, he made sure to type an apology to the Spanish girl.

But apologizing is easier said than done. Lovino stared at the screen, not quite sure how – or _what_ – to say. It wasn't his fault that this whole fiasco happened in the first place, and somewhere, his pride refused to bow his head and apologize to the farmhand.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** soh**  
**10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Lovi! Oh my  
seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **I'm so sorry!  
Just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino watched as his wall was subjected to a new influx of frantic, apologetic posts from Anita. Fuck, now he could feel the guilt settling in.

All right, he shouldn't have been petty and gone all jealous-girlfriend fuck on Anita; they were just acquaintances, and acquaintances weren't bound to each other…

_Suck it up and be man! Or do you want your brother to – _

Lovino shoved the thought of his brother away and went to fetch a tomato.

At least he'd probably never see Anita in real life – no, he did _not_ just feel disappointed! – so that was half the embarrassment saved.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Uh. Anita… wsay sorry **  
**10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Well. That was awkward.

The Italian was now popping cherry tomatoes into his mouth by the second.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** I mean **  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** you should be  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** I am sorry,. **  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

_Fucking _awkward.

Minutes passed and nothing happened.

Trying to quell the growing uneasiness in his chest, Lovino pulled himself away from the computer and went to take a shower, hoping the coldhot water would soothe his frazzled nerves.

It didn't.

He tapped his fingers along the keyboard, aimlessly scrolling up and down on Anita's profile page (not that he was stalking her Recent Activity!) before stopping at her profile picture.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** you look pretty tanned in your picture**  
**2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

No shit Sherlock.

**Anita F.C.: **Ehheh! Working in the farm helps a lot , you know :D  
10 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** italy's good for suntans too. **  
**5 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **i'll try it out one day ~  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

And just like that, it was as if all troubles were gone.

* * *

**Anita F.C. .****is super, duper, urber happy right now! ****  
**10:35 pm · Like · Comment  
Feliciano loves PASTA likes this.

**Anita F.C.: **LOVI SAID SORRYZ!  
58 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall  
Feliciano loves PASTA likes this.

**Anita F.C.: **TOO COUTE!  
58 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **SQUEEE !  
58 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA****:** SQUEE!  
30 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **heehee!  
30 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA****:** GO GO ANITA!  
20 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Feliciano loves PASTA****:** I luv antsy Lovi so mch ~ :D  
20 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **I love all kinds of lovi 3  
20 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall  
Feliciano loves PASTA likes this.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** I'd like it if you two didn't talk so fucking openly about me. Where I can fucking see it all **  
**5 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **oh lovi dotn be dso embraressed  
2 seconds ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Feliciano felt that not only was Anita good at heart, too scatterbrained and concerned over his brother, she honestly had too much love to handle.

* * *

**A/N: **In my head-canon, Feli's eyes are WMDs . And he's a closet masochist. /shot.

I'd take this chance to once again thank lovely lovetemashika for her fanart. lessthanthree. for. ever.


	5. Saturday

**A/N:**

**Notice: **

I'm sorry, terribly sorry, especially after so long without any updates.

I've been feeling rather down lately. And really jittery and scared and depressed and - oh. Besides multiple exams, there's my paranoia and insecurities and annoying,annoying personality. I don't know how long it's going to take for me to feel better but I hope it will be soon. It's all self-brought, I am so

This will probably be the last chapter in another long while. I don't think I can keep up with my 'weekly update' or offer you up-to-standard chapters. I understand if you want to un-alert and unsubscribe; I just want to thank you all for keeping me going since Chapter 1. But I h

If any of you read Thirty Days or Looking for Angels , I'm extremely sorry about them too. Especially Thirty Days.  
- eatingpaper.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

* * *

"Thank you! Please come again!" Chelle bowed and waved goodbye to the last group of customers, before flipping the CLOSED-OPEN sign and flopping down backwards onto an empty chair. "I'm _so_ tir_e_d!"

"Mmhmm…" Lars offered, lazily wiping the tables clean while Mei and Katyusha carried the dishes to the back. Buono Tomato, unlike other restaurants, opened its doors at nine in the morning, with the last orders at nine in the night. In between the twelve hours was an hour-long break for the staff to rest.

Said break was also meal time for them, so when Feliciano's call of 'Lunch!' came from the kitchens, the waiters flocked towards the metal double doors, out of which suddenly appetizing aromas wafted out.

Eyeing the assortment of pasta and various dishes spanning a few cultures laid out on one of the long metal tables, Chelle grinned broadly. "People say if you work in Wacs, you'd get sick of their food –"

" –but somehow Feli and Mister Grumps make it work!" someone cut in. This received a collective laugh from the workers, which grew louder when a tomato flew across the kitchen to smack the speaker in the face.

Feliciano pouted. He'd thought being with Anita would make his petulant brother more agreeable… "Fratello!" Bounding over to Lovino, he peered over his shoulder into a large pot of tomato soup. Lovino immediately raised his shoulder, making Feliciano's head jerk backwards with a yelp.

"Don't come so close; stupid is contagious."

Francis, mixing one of his tangy sauces, called out reproachfully. "Don't be so mean to your brother, Lovino."

"Shut your mouth and continue working!" Lovino shot back, adjusting the heat.

"Even if Lovino's a jerk, his cooking makes up for it," Chelle called out through a mouthful of bruschetta, "You keep cookin', we keep lovin', you keep throwin' – tomato!" the horde of restaurant staff ducked as the red fruit sailed towards the girl, missing her by mere inches. Chelle straightened up, wiping a hand over her forehead in an exaggerated manner.

"Ass-hats, the lot of you," Lovino grumbled, untying his apron and stuffing it into a random overhead cupboard. The rest just laughed and continued eating while the kitchen-hands cleared the tomato remains, washed the emptied dishes and tablecloths.

"Fratello, going already?" Feliciano looked up from the bread he was kneading as Lovino put on his watch again.

"What do you think, ass-face?" He scoffed. Just then, the kitchen doors swung open and a blonde rapped hard on the metal.

"Finish stuffing your faces and get ready for work; doors open again at five-fifteen." The staff groaned in unison and a few pouted at the bespectacled girl. Alice just shrugged and crossed her arms, leaning against the door.

Francis' lips pulled into a large smile. "Why be so grumpy, ma cherie? You'll get awful wrinkles."

"And look like Lovino!"

Said couple glared at the speakers and flipped them off.

* * *

Anita was staring hard at the screen as she had been for the past hour or three. Occasionally her eyes would drift to the clock at the bottom, ticking away the day.

It was eleven fifty-two in the night. Eight more minutes and the day would be over. And Lovino had yet to make his customary appearance.

Ten minutes later, she rolled over onto her bed. But no amount of tossing and turning could shake off that numbing pain in her chest.

* * *

Lovino woke up with a start. Something had kicked his leg and he wasn't happy. His head wasn't happy either; the throbbing hangover was making itself known the more awake he became. Cursing, he clumsily sat up and reached for his nightlight – not that he wasn't afraid of the dark! Feliciano had bought it for him and he was just too lazy to throw it away. But even before his searching fingers failed to switch on the lamp, he knew something was wrong. Very wrong.

Wrong in the way that he could hear other sounds of breathing. Wrong in the way that his bed was somehow harder than he remembered. Wrong in the way he had somehow lost his shirt in the night. Wrong in the way that the Glow-In-The-Dark stars Feliciano had stuck over his ceiling weren't there anymore. Wrong in the way that some_thing_ was pressing against his side. Wrong in the way that he had been kicked awake in the first place.

With a yelp – very manly yelp at that – he scrambled away, crashing into a wall and then into another as he tried to get away.

"Fucking shit, what are you doing?"

Lovino paused in his frantic attempt to escape. The fog clouding his brain was still there, but the voice seemed distantly familiar.

Much more carefully and better orientated, Lovino made his way across the room and flipped on the light switch he dimly remembered being there.

"Ow! Ow _ow!_" A different voice yelled out. "Turn off the light! Now! It's fucking killing me! I'm melting, fucking _melting!_ Turn it off, turn it off!"

"Shut up, ass-hat," Lovino answered, inspecting his arms for bruises. Content that there were none, he took in the scene before him.

Furniture was haphazardly arranged, sticking, empty plates lay on any flat surface, the television was showing some midnight soap opera with the sound off, game consoles were lying abandoned with their wires tangled together, a hockey stick teetered on its blade against the wall for a moment before clattering onto the floor.

Curled up on the sofa was Gillian, moaning in pain and clutching a cushion over her face. On the floor were bottles of beer and maple syrup, scattered tulip petals, and Matthew.

The usually gentle boy reached for a nearby cushion and threw it in the girl's general direction with a loud groan. "Shut up, you're not _melting_! And Lovino, either turn off the lights or make yourself useful, ay!"

Lovino grudgingly made his way to the kitchen to search for hangover cures, avoiding wayward splotches of maple syrup. Behind, Gillian's head shot up, crimson eyes made redder with the booze glaring unhappily through the silver-white hair. "Like_ you _know anything! It's all your fault this happened in the first place!"

"I wasn't the one who went batshit crazy over a bunch of flowers!" Matthew shot back, rolling over into a sitting position.

"I did _not," _Gillian said piously, "I was merely protecting my rights as your awesome _girlfriend_!"

"I _did _tell you Lars is only a friend! A _straight _friend."

"Well, you never know!"

Matthew waved his hand dismissively, "Ay, ay." He gratefully accepted the bottles of vitamin concentrate Lovino offered him, gulping down one and tossing the other to the albino on his couch.

"Some kind of awesome girlfriend you are," Lovino used his feet to herd the roaming tulip petals in a pile. He'd have to tell Lars to stop sending Matthew tulip bouquets – and to stop making Lovino carry those goddamned bouquets to Matthew's house whenever he visited his friend. Because carrying those fucking flowers was really gay. Which he wasn't. And not to mention set Gillian after his case.

Gillian opened her mouth to retort, but was quickly silenced by an irritated glare from Matthew. The Canadian was always less affable in the mornings and after drinking marathons like the one they just had; it as if the more the day wore on, the more mellow he became.

Groaning, he glanced at the Canadian flag-themed clock. Though blurry, he could make out the time as three forty-two. In the morning. Matthew eyed his chaotic living room. He looked at Gillian, pouting and bemoaning her melting hand. "If the mess isn't cleared, you won't be getting any for the month."

Lovino blanched; he_ really _didn't need that mental image. Especially not after walking in on the pair kissing – no, fucking _sucking _each other's faces off – and instinctively throwing the tulip bouquet at them.

* * *

By six, the living room was cleared up, amid a lot of drama coming from Gillian; she claimed she was much too awesome to be cleaning maple syrup off the linoleum. Matthew was making pancakes for the three of them, Gillian had seized the rediscovered the WayStation and was insulting the pink-haired character she was playing.

Lovino was enjoying his hot shower. Enjoying it until he remembered suddenly that he hadn't left anything on Anita's Wall. He wasn't feeling anxious or guilty, he was just…courteous. Yeah. That was it. And he was a courteous man.

* * *

Anita checked her profile again, just in case Lovino had woken up early and decided to post something…anything on her Wall.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Anita i**  
**10 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** oh Anita, your eyes are like the sun, shining through the forest leaves  
7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** your smile lights up my day and puts the sun to shame **  
**7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** your hair, oh so long and so silky; I yearn to touch it aga**  
**7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** HAHAHA I'M MORE AWESOME THAN YOOOOUUUU. **  
**7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **LOVI! You cound like Gilly! **  
**6 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **do you know whoGilly is ?**  
**6 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **she's this white-ahried girl and also one of my ebst firensts :D **  
**6 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** DUH, TATA, OF COURSE YOUR LITTLE BOYFRIEND KNOWS WHO I AM. I'M TOO AWESOME TO BE NOT KNOWN BY ANYONE! **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Gilly?**  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **what did you do to lovi =? **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** WELL , MATTIE'S HOLDING ON TO HIM. **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** OW! FUCK! HE JUST KICKED ME. IN THE BOOB. WHY DO YOU KNOW THIS LITTLE BALL OF SHIT?**  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita's smile darkened a little at that.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** ARENT YOU STILL IN SPAIN? YOU'RE STILL I NSPAIN RIGHT! COME BAAACK1 COME BACK COME BACK CO **  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** SORry about that, Anita. **  
**3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **it's okay! But to make up for it and for yesterdays' , you need to restart(: i have to go now. **  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

* * *

This chapter is rather dry. I kinda-sorta lost the pizzazz halfway through.


	6. Sunday

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia - Axis Powers . I only own my portrayal of characters, Albert and this story. It's only a little; please do _**not**_ steal.

So anyway.

Today was supposed to be a happy day. _Supposed_. Because in your life, there will always be people who jump at any chances to bring you down. There will be people who are unreasonable and outright ridiculus. There will be people who are carrying so much hurt and hatred in their hearts they just have to pick on others to make themselves feel better. There will be people who are so lazy, so unimaginative and uninspired that they have to steal other peoples' hardwork. There will be people who are too cowardly, too concerned for themselves to intervene for the victims.

Urgh.

It's funny, in a sad way, how these kinds of people make me appreciate the world so much more. Cherish the good, change the bad, and learn from the ugly.

But still. Why do people have to spoil the happiness of others? I was so jingly-happy and psyched and in the mood for writing this. And BAM! Down comes reality and the cruelty of mankind. RAWH! /throws arms up in frustration.

But I love you guys. And I owe you. Like. A lot. Like. My life. [smiley face]

On a side note: Go listen to **'Antebellum' by Vienna Teng.** I had it on repeat for this entire chapter, hurhur. It's a lovely song, I think. It's rather fitting for the majority of history.

On another side note:

1) Happy birthday Norgey-poo! I love you and your mythology, even though the film 'Thor' quite butchered it (the graphics were good, though)  
2) Happy Royal-Marriage-Day, Britons! (Singapore's a Commonwealth Nation, so we're counted too, right, right?) You guys made my birthday even more special [/wipes tear]  
3) ... I can't remember...I know it had to do with some other country...

On yet another side note: Thank you, all you lovely readers who took the time to mesage me [smiley face] It made me feel so much better [double smiley face]

On yet another another side ntoe: It's been a long time, do forgive for any language errors and rusty writing.

* * *

**Facebook Status . **Chapter Six - Sunday** _{weird, wired, weried}_**

* * *

"Gillian!"

It had been a peaceful Sunday morning; the birds were singing away in their trees and children were waking up to Sunday morning feasts.

"GILLIAN!"

Matthew was flipping pancakes, Lovino was still sulking at the computer table, glaring murderously at the two other occupants of the house.

"_GILLIAN!" _

The girl burst from the couch in a flurry of clothes, leapt to the other end of the room and ninja-rolled under the kitchen table just as the front door was flung open. A metal _twang!_ was heard as a frying pan bounced off the opposite wall and a long haired woman marched into the flat.

Lovino fell off his chair with a squawk.

"Hello Eliza, you'd be paying for the door, right," Matthew greeted the brunette calmly whilst Lovino scrambled up with as much dignity as he could.

Elizaveta replied cheerfully, "Just bill it to Gillian's account, Mattie!" She then picked up her frying pan and checked it for any damage.

An indignant voice came from the table, "Hey! You can't anyhow bill things on – HEY, I'm the _only_ one that can call Mattie 'Mattie'!"

"Oh look, it's a talking table," Elizaveta said dryly. "You never learn, do you?"

"Old habits die hard," Gillian declared sourly, peeping over the edge of the table. "Weren't you supposed to be mooching over with Mister Fancy-Pants? What'cha doing here?"

The frying-pan suddenly appeared before Gillian, knocking her over onto the linoleum. Matthew stepped over the writhing singer, placing four plates of pancakes on the kitchen table. "Stop glaring at me and come eat, ay," he called to Lovino.

"You forget that 'Mister Fancy-Pants' is your _producer –_"

"Who's fucking fault do you think it is?"

"Pansy Mister Fancy-Pants!"

"Your _producer _with the power to remove you –"

"Sure, go ahead and try it. You know I'm too awesome to be removed. And besides, the only butt-kicking around here is done by me. The awesome me."

"But it was too much to resist. And Gil says friends help each others' relationship problems, ay."

"_What _relationship problems?"

"And how do you expect to butt-kick when you're always late for things! Yesterday was supposed to be recording for your new album!"

"Recording smchcording. Yesterday I was awesomely kicking-butt as –"

"Going fucking ballistic, you mean."

"It's my rights!"

"Well, it was good practice. I'm supposed to be writing another book about romance. And you know how awful Gil is at that."

"I can only imagine."

"Hey! Hey!"

"Fucking _embarrassing_!"

"Mattie you're supposed to be on _my _side!"

"Don't talk when you're eating – your pancakes will _drown _in all that syrup – _Gillian!_"

"Ah, so you admit it, ay."

Lovino scowled at the smirking blonde and gave him the finger. He'd go take his share of pancakes and stake out at the computer.

N-not that he was waiting for anything, fuck no. He was Lovino Vargas, he didn't wait after Spanish girls like a fucking _lovesick _boyfriend. He was just – just – going to look up tourist destinations in Spain, that's all.

Right.

Matthew continued smiling to himself. Feliciano had been right; Anita was perfect for Lovino. And now… how to shut up those two others…?

He sighed. It was hard having a rock star as a girlfriend, especially one like Gillian. It was almost as bad as having his brother around.

Almost. Because love made up the better half of it.

* * *

The house was quiet when he awoke, which surprised him. Usually Liesel would be downstairs meddling in the kitchen (she was so cute when she wore that frilly apron he bought her last year – or was it three months ago? Or –) or filling the house with the hum of the baby blue vacuum (a blue that matched her eyes!) in the (spotless!) living room, or waking him up with a whistle (she had quite the motley collection of them).

Either that or Gillian would be making a commotion with Elizaveta (the poor woman, and so wonderful too!).

But the house was silent. He was cold from lying in the bed alone.

"Lieschen?" Feliciano padded down the steps, peering blurry-eyed into the kitchen.

On the counter were five dishes of pasta, covered in cling-wrap, along with a Post-It:

_Feliciano, _

_I will be on location until tomorrow. I hope 5 plates is enough – if it isn't, there's more flour in the cupboard. But please, don't let Gillian know that. I don't need another flour-encrusted-house episode. _

_Aside from that, please remember to think very carefully before doing anything. _

_Thank you, Liesel. _

Feliciano pouted. He loved Liesel. Which meant he loved her job by association. But really, sometimes it was a bit depressing! Especially when he had finally gotten Lovino to agree to him moving out! And when they only have time together on the weekends (Weeknights didn't count because they were usually – too…tired)! But Liesel loved her job, and Feliciano wanted to be the good boyfriend by supporting her.

He beamed as he unwrapped a plate of pasta. Liesel had made gnocchi for him!

Well. Today was Sunday. He'd eat a plate (maybe two, or four) before meeting up with Lovi for Mass. Then maybe they could have wonderful brother bonding time!

(Even though the idea of being bonded, i.e. sticking out of Lovino's liver, to his brother made him quiver).

* * *

Lovino tapped his fingers along the keyboard to the tune of the song he was listening to. He was trying to think of something interesting to say, but after a day with his brother, Potato Bitch (Number 2) and Alice on the side, he didn't feel quite up to the task. Giving up, he went to stal – _look at _– his brother's twitter page (yes, Lovino was very tech-savvy, so you can stop sniggering behind your hand now).

_Hmm…_ Lovino scrolled down his brother's tweets, munching on cherry tomatoes again.

* * *

**Anita F.C.:** LOVI! I missed you :D **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Ciao Anita! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Fratello and I had a wonderful day today! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Really? what was it like ?**  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** We had delicious ice-cream at the park! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** TOMATO FLAVOURED? was it yummy?what kind?**  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** oh it was chocolate with maraschino cherries on top! Very yummy. And pretty! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** and then we had a walk around the park!**  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** and saw so many pigeons! Pigeons are so fat and pudgy haha! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** oh oh oh and ther were so many couples kissing under the trees and hiding in the bushes too! **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** why were they hiding I nthe bushes ? **  
**1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** haha why would I know? **  
**59 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** are you alright, lovi?**  
**50 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** of course! why wouldn't I be alright? Haha, silly Anita!**  
**46 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** and today I also had pancakes at Matt's house. And your best friend Gillian was there too! It was so much fun haha! **  
**46 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** WHO ARE UOU AND WHAT HAVE OYU DONE TO MY LOVI?**  
**40 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Ahaha Anita, what are you saying? **  
**30 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** you…you can stop now**  
**20 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** isn't this better?**  
**just moments ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita stared at the screen. She stared at the row of tomato seedlings barely visible in the dimming light. She stared at the large jelly-bean jar, half-filled with coins and a few notes. She stared at the screen again.

**Anita F.C.:** Lovi, I don't know why you're behaving like thi, but I prefer the old you more. The real you. not this. this. this . façade. Come back, por favour? **  
**3 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She'd learnt that world from Gillian's boyfriend a few weeks back, and was proud to have finally used it.

**Anita F.C.:** Lovi?**  
**3 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

The minutes ticked by, and still no reply came from Lovino. Perhaps she had gone too far? But it really had seemed as if Lovino was putting on cute airs; why, she couldn't fathom.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Yeah?**  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Not all hope was lost!

**Anita F.C.:** Are you back to normal now?**  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** don't know what fucking shit you're talking about .where did you learn that word? I'm impressed with your vocabulary, dumbfuck. **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She couldn't help breaking into a large smile. Well. The language was a little demoralizing… but Lovi was back to his normal self!

**Anita F.C.:** yay you're back! welcome back Lovi! Haha I can't wait to tell you about my dsa yt today **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **you se today there was this new farm hand tha came! His name is Albert and he's from Begium! And he's really weird. Like. Really. wired. **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** new farm hand?  
7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Weird* **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** YA. YA. I mean. You think I'm weird right, but this albert guy is weirder! And creeeepy ): he doesn't know how to take care of tomatoes proepryl ether DDDD: **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** you're already weird enough, stupid .**  
**7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** he came iin a dress suit! In this little village in spain! so weird! And his hair is all combed back and all, it's really suspicious. An the weirdest / creepiest is that he keeps on staking at me. so scrary! What if he'sa homicidal killer? Lovi**  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** lovi you must save me before he kills me ): **  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Two new words used! She was getting better at this!

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Oh for the love of Goats. Why would any one want to kill you? It's not like you're special or anything**  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ah. That's true, lovi…**  
**2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Glad you see sense for once. **  
**about 2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** so how was oyur day, really ?**  
**about 2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Well. I said I had breakfast at Matt's. And a fcrazy brunette – Elizaveta – came in and made a scene and scoffed down Matt's pancake. Talk about inconsiderate!**  
**about 2 hours ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He failed to mention the inconsideration on his own part.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** And she's the Potato Bitch's manager! And they really don't like each other. Their lives are so messed up.  
about an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Ah~ Gilly's always complaining about her manager! **  
**about an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Mmyeah. **  
**about an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He wasn't – he wasn't upset or jealous that Anita already knew all this. For fuck's sake! Forget jealousy, why was he upset anyway?

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** And then the Frying-Pan dragged the douche bag off to work whilst matt went to church. Feli and I had Mass, and then we ran into Alice and her boytoy. **  
**about half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Alice… Alice Kirkland? **  
**about half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Yeah. How do you know her? **  
**about half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I wouls never forget her face.  
half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Right. **  
**half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He refused to acknowledge the sudden chill he felt. which was 'really wired', because he was getting rather hot – and it was fucking _not _because of the blush spreading across his cheeks!

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** Then Feli and I had our walk – the nerve and indecency of some people! **  
**28 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita smiled. She could just imagine him huffing angrily with his arms across his chest. She could just imagine how his cheeks would be coloured an adorable shade of red and puffed out.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** I had to keep telling Feli they were looking for birds' nests and hunting for worms – slimy gross things.**  
**27 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Ah? The people or the worms? **  
**27 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino thought this over for a second.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Both. Duh. Dipshit.  
27 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita laughed. It didn't matter that they weren't face to face; she was sure Lovino knew it. Saw it. Felt it. She never did understand that mysteries of life – that was why they were mysterious, si?

**Lovino Fucking Vargas:** And then we made pasta at the Potato Bastard's house, because I don't have any more and we finished the plates the Potato B left for us. Can't believe Feli taught her! Traitor! **  
**24 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Oj lovi …. **  
**24 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino placed a hand to his forehead. It didn't seem feverish. Weird.

He shrugged it off, and went to bed after the conversation ended. But it seemed to continue on even after he shut his eyes, in a dream of tomatoes, sun and laughing brunettes.

Funny. Maybe he'd go visit the doctor. At least he could tell him what was wrong with _him_.

* * *

**A/N: **_**OH OH I FORGOT SOMETHHING IMPORTANT: I've become quite impartial to both FrUK and USUK (I'M SO SORRY, I'M SORRY! ) So. I'm opening up to suggestions as to who Alice's 'boytoy' is(: (A-ac-actually...I still like USUK with France-Seychelles / France-Joan d'arc ) Come people, come and influence me. Haha. Okay, okay I'm too high off of M&M's (the dark chocolate and the peanut-butter ones are super uber good!)**_ Weird, Wired, Weried. One of my most liked/hated spelling errors ever. Anyway.

A little story is that : I only discovered the word 'linoleum' around three years ago. I fell in love with it. Promptly. It's such a lovely word! So.._sleek _and _polished_. 'Linoleum', 'linoleum', 'linoleum'. It was a story in which, I quote: "...saliva was dripping onto the linoleum". I was twelve. I was 'What the _heck _is linoleum? Some kind of gasoline?'

D'ah. Sounds stupid, but I am stupid.

My first round of examinations ended two days ago! I'm getting back three of my papers tomorrow, and I'm **_so not _**looking forward to it. Sigh.

I hope you guys have a wonderful day (or night, it's 11:42pm here in Singapore) and an enjoyable week. And don't let any one bring you down. The better, stronger person is the one who can forgive and move on.


	7. Monday

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of the characters portrayed. I only own Albert, my character-interpretations, and this story. It's little, please do _not _steal.**

**A/N: **Hello my cuppycakes!

Yes, cool nickname, I know.

If you've made it this far, you should know by now that I love to, and tend to, excessively take advantage of my **A/N**s to talk about thinks. Yes, thinks, no, it's not a spelling mistake. But I'll thank you for putting up with 6 chapters of my random thoughts. I like doing so. Makes me feel connected to you people, y'know?

Anyway.

I think I've successfully recovered, hopefully. Just last Tuesday, an incident occured, and it spurred my decision to put away all my rubbish thoughts and horrid feelings. The most empowering things are, ironically, the most hurtful things. Oh well. Enough with the moaning and crying. I'm done with that.

So I've been enjoying my (study)holiday break a little too much. I've still mountains of homework and syllabus to cover, so I apologize for breaking my promise to update regualrly T.T I'm horrid.

But see. Today I was reading the newspaper, and saw this advertisement for a Flamenco exhibition in Singapore, and it is choreographed by - wait for it - _Antonio Vargas_.

_Oh_, my mother asked me why I was giggling like a madwoman. _Oh_, it must be a sign. Of course.

So there you have this. It's strained and a bit jumpy, because Microsoft so graciously decided to die on me, leaving my document unsaved and unretrievable. And believe me when I say it's hard to write something you've written before. I don't know why. I just can't remember the words used and stuff like that. Ho hum. But other than that, you can blame my awkward writing, too.

Constructive criticism greatly appreciated(:

Oh yes. Do read my bottom **A/N** and respond. Heehee. Shameless plugging, I know.

* * *

**Facebook Status . **Chapter Seven - Monday _**{deep thoughts; deep feelings}**_

* * *

"…heat flushes, quickened heart rates and nervous moments?" Lovino licks his lips. He hates hospitals; he hates clinics and everything within. There is that overlying lemony scent masking the stench of disease and death, the hush and the whitewash to bury the bloodstains. And not to mention the metallic implements, glittering in their grotesque beauty in the tray by the doctor's table.

But the one thing that creeps him out the most is the doctor, with his violet eyes, pale, pale hair and strange smile.

"Y-yes, Doctor Braginsky," Lovino stammers out. Damn it, he hates being _weak_ in front of this man. "So, do y-you uh, know what's w-wrong with m-me?"

Doctor Braginsky just fixes him with those violet eyes, alight with childish, _cruel_, joy. "You might want to ask Francis for that!" He says cheerfully, like it isn't a life-or-death matter.

It probably isn't, but Lovino isn't taking any chances, even if it means asking that wino-freak.

* * *

Francis is in a good mood. He even pauses to wave to the obnoxious telecommunications man – what was his name, creamy Alfreddo or something? – as he exits the restaurant.

It doesn't matter that just hours ago, he had been threatened with retrenchment, head-butted in the stomach, or had ice-water poured over him.

For Lovino had consulted him with a 'fucking life threatening medical condition'. Francis had, jaw-dropping and laughing aside, quite calmly told him that he was merely in love, and Lovino had done all of the above, with copious amounts of blushing, and swearing hard enough to make a sailor cry.

"_I am not, I repeat, am _not, _in love!" _was his defiant yell.

And now the whole kitchen knew.

Francis can't deny that he is fond of his employers, with a special spot for the irate older twin because he rather liked his lovers feisty – but that is another story (with Alice Kirkland stamped all over), and he is glad that Anita had found someone to live happily with.

But what makes him even happier was that Alice had been the one to towel his hair and bring him a fresh change of clothes.

_Oh, _Francis thinks to himself as he disembarks the bus and steps lightly up to his front door, _today is good day!_

He buries his head in his window-boxes of roses, not before checking for bees, smiling.

* * *

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **hello. How long more until I finish this stupid dare?  
27 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** -pouts- **  
**29 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** loviiiii don't say that ): **  
**29 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** what will happen to be whne we stop talking? **  
**30 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** acuallty then i shoulden't acknowledge your presence any more**  
**30 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** then you'd always have to redo and redo and redo ! hahas ! **  
**30 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **thanks, crazy woman. It's not like you can order me around.  
38 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ah – ah lovi! No ! I mean. I didn't mean that): **  
**38 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** come back, por favour? **  
**39 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I will seriously die if you don't talk to me any more. **  
**40 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Ah. Then you'd have my death on your hands. **  
**43 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **…like hell I'd believe that.  
51 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** try me :)(**  
**52 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **what the fuck is that supposed to be?  
52 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ah welll, a :) because I know you wont try it and a :( because I'm so very, very sad that I had to resort to this **  
**52 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **bullshit.  
54 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

But he changes the subject.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **So today I went to the doctor because I've been feeling rather weird lately.  
9 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

And promptly forgets himself.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **And the creepy-ass-rapist-stalker of a doctor tells me to go and ask Francis. Francis, that wino pervert freak  
9 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **and then the wino freak tells me that I'm in love.  
9 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **instead of down with a fucking disease.  
8 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **which is pretty fucked up. Because I'm too cool for love, you know. and besides there's no females I'm possibly in love with. unless it's tomatoes.  
8 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **which would be totally cool with me.  
8 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **because they're just about as fucking BAMF as I am.  
8 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** really no females you're in love with ?**  
**3 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino takes a few minutes to ponder this question. Well, there's Alice, but that's Francis and the Alfreddo man's job, and Chelle, Katyusha and Mei, all of whom are obviously out. Then there's the Potato bitches, with whom – heaven forbid – love's not in _sniffing_ distance with.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **No. definitely not.  
about 1 hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I see **  
**58 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** well uhm. If oy uever find teh girl that yoru'e in love pleas,e do tell me okay ? **  
**58 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Alright. But it's probably just the tomatoes. And francis' lousy ass judging  
57 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** but isn't it good that it sinet anything serious?s**  
**54 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** i would be muy tristes if lovi wereto be i nanny danger. **  
**54 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

There it is! That heat flush again! Curse that Bonnefoy! Curse Creeper Braginsky!

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **well I guess so.  
51 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **but …  
50 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Should he tell her? It seems like a great leap in trust and a sign of intimacy. Intimacy, he never really was fond of it. Letting someone close to your heart meant leaving yourself open for hurt.

But. Oh well. It couldn't hurt, could it? It wasn't like – ah, what kind of man is he? Being a BAMF meant he is tough enough for _anything_.

_Fuck _intimacy.

**Anita F.C.:** but yeah?**  
**50 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **when I was a small kid, I kept on having spasms. Like jerky movements.  
Choreia, y'know?  
46 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** nope. **  
**45 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ah yeah i do! **  
**44 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **…..  
41 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** the vegetable stall lady's son used to have somethign liek that! He would be randomly jerking in funy ways **  
**41 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **yuh.  
41 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ah! the tarantella~! **  
**40 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **T- what?  
40 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Tarantella, lovi! It's a kind of dnace! And a very fun one oto1  
39 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **too bad. I don't dance  
37 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** rubbish! Feli don't me the two of you took lessons in daicng sicne you were young! **  
**37 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **well. This is different  
33 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ahhaha~ **  
**33 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **i doooooooooooont dance.  
about half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

It isn't because – isn't because he afraid he'd look stupid, okay?

**Anita F.C.:** it's oakY! You won't know until you try it, si? **  
**about half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Fuck, what?

**Anita F.C.:** It doesn't matter if you're good or bad at things, only if you are willing to try and do better~ unless, of cours,e ifyou dont dare to do it **  
**about half an hour ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Sure…

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **pft. Who says I don't dare?  
26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** no one, lovi! Just incasue your'e afraid yo uaren t good at it yet . **  
**26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** evne if yo uthink you arene't good enough now, you'll be, one day. And you odnt need to worry about the ones who are already good ebcause we all are different . you shouldnt constantly match yourslef agiant other people . but see~ if you do it, then you'd get beeeter at dancing ~**  
**24 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

She could imagine Lovino's adorable scowl, and his tomato blush painting his cheeks.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **oh, shut up about the getting better parts.  
22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **Oye~  
22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **if you don't know hwo to dance the tarantella, I can alwyas teach you.  
22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.: **you said you were goinign to come to spain soon, si? :D  
21 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

_Oh_ is she excited!

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Yeah yeah.  
19 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Oh man. What has he done to himself?

But _damn_, did that Spanish woman have deep things to say.

* * *

"B_it_ch!"

Alice's head shoots up, and she groggily stumbles out of bed, expertly manoeuvring herself through darkened hallways to the living room. Incessant pounding comes from the front door, peppered with swears and other obscenities.

Sighing, she unlocks the door, bracing herself for the figure that immediately collapses onto her smaller frame.

The red-haired lady grins up her, "'Sup, bitch. I'mma hooome," and she is out like a light. She reeks of alcohol, burning Alice's nose. Groaning, she lugs her sister to the couch, upon which Alice promptly dumps her. Leaving her sister hanging half-off-half-on, she goes back to bed, where she lies, quite unable to return dreamland.

So she stays away for the short remainder of the night, cursing her sister, cursing her mother, her father and anyone else she can think of. Curse god, too, for bringing her into this awful family.

But this is the same god who gives her a gossamer touch of hope in her dreary life.

And she doesn't quite know what to do.

* * *

Matthew gulps down the fifth tumbler of coffee, glumly staring at the screen before him. _Macrohard Word _is open, it's pristine white face staring blankly back at him. The only words on it are

_**Looking for Angels **_

He can't think of the rest of the story. And it's not really his fault. Not really, anyway. He's just a ghost-writer – what is he doing, trying to write his own story? Sighing, he closes the document, not bothering to save it, and returns to his newest assignment, the romance novel set in the 21st Century.

_There are so many of these around_, Matthew thinks, reading through the brief plotline for the sixtieth time that night. _What a horrible cliché, typical plot_! And for the rest of the night, Matthew churns out the story and bemoans the travesty it is to creativity.

* * *

**A/N: **Anita's words are some things I'm desperate to tell people. 1) Don't give up. 2) If you don't try, you'll never know. 3) Don't compare yourself to others because whilst it may be motivation at times, these things must be pursued in interest and joy.

I apologize for Lovino's OOC-ness. Now I know I shouldn't stay up at 3:17 am to type. Yes, I tried to sneak in some dark!Spain, but failed.

Does anyone _really _look at the time-stamps for the Wall Posts and count back? Just curious.

And I was wondering, does anyone have any perference, or suggestions for Scotland's Fem!Name? Yes, it's Scotland. I wrote this with Pixiv's unofficial!Scotland design in mind, all the England-abuse included. I have a particular fondness for abuse-relationships. Perhaps because the comfortable intimacy for sarcasm, to call people names, and tease them is something I desire. Not the chilly politeness of superficial friendships.


	8. Tuesday II

**A/N: **Sorry for the late update guys. I promise, for the next three chapters at least, you'll get (fairly)regular updates. Heehee. I hope you like this chapter(: As always, constructive criticism greatly appreciated.

* * *

**Facebook Status . **Chapter Eight - Tuesday _**{in the nile}**_

* * *

Tuesday dawned bright and sunny, with Innes waking up in a terrible mood. It had less to do with the heavy drinking the night before and more to do with her sister, who was currently setting their kitchen on fire.

"How many times have I told you _not _to fucking cook?" The saucepan contained blackened eggs and bacon, amid leaping red flames, and what looked like charcoal popped out of the toaster amid plumes of smoke. Innes scowled as she watched Alice struggling to douse the fire. "Your 'coffee' is like carbon mixed with water and yet you work in a fucking _restaurant_…" and so began the daily tirade against Alice's culinary skill (or lack thereof) and poor vocation choices.

Alice, having given up justifying her case that she was Buono Tomato's _accountant_ after the fifth attempt, was silently doing her best to dry the sopping kitchen. Well. It had been foolish of her to hope that maybe today the eggs would decide not to stick to the pan and that the toast would magically listen to her and pop up nicely golden.

She wondered why she even bothered, when breakfast for Innes comprised chugging down vitamin concentrate, honey water and perhaps a shot of Scotch.

* * *

In Buono Tomato's kitchen, the staff were busy preparing for opening. The air was filled with the smell of freshly baked goods, and the sound of pounding came from Gupta, preparing falafel balls and dips. Kitchen hands tottered about, pulling out trays and buttering rolls, and the floor staff heaved sacks of locally sourced figs, almonds and whatnot to the storage room. The ricotta was to be cut just so, bread pulled apart for panzanella, the salt cod soaked for tonight's baccalà…

Lovino was busy making pasta dough, too engrossed in his work to take note of the other chefs bustling around him. So it was that he didn't notice Francis greeting him cheerfully over his pot of spicy radish sauce. He noticed neither the sudden change from disappointment to malicious glint in the Frenchman's eyes when he realized Lovino wasn't aware of his presence, nor when Francis sidled up behind him. But he did notice, however, when Francis enveloped him from behind, putting French hands in places where _they were not wanted_.

"_**MOTHERFUCKIN'!**_"

"Mon ami, it was your fa – put the dough down! We can talk!"

"No talk. Just you –"

"Mmm, who's bed –"

"–_Dead_."

It was then that peace loving Gupta ran to get Alice. Or Feliciano. Or perhaps even Leon, with his pyromania that would stop a raging bull in its tracks.

* * *

Alfred stood outside the restaurant, jiggering nervously about, occasionally leaning to the side to peer through the glass front and stare mournfully at the CLOSED sign. It was during one of his peering moments that Alice unfortunately opened the door, slamming it into his face.

"Oh, it's you," Alice said flatly after getting over her shock and guilt to recognize the telecommunications man.

"I'm alright! The hero would never be brought down by such an attack!"Alfred immediately declared – even though his nose hurt so very terribly.

She nodded her head indifferently. "We're not interested, in whatever you're trying to sell."

Alfred opened his mouth to say something more, but a blonde swooped down on him, slinging an arm around his neck and effectively cut of his speech.

Francis beamed at the man, "Alfredo! You seem to need a bit more butter!" and so saying, dragged the nonplussed man back into the restaurant.

_Freaks, _Alice thought to herself. She had graduated from college with high hopes of finally leaving the perverse Frenchman (and his equally low friends) behind, only to find that he was attending the same university as her – and now working in the same place! Someone up there must hate her.

* * *

**Anita F.C.:** Hello Lovi! **  
**48 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** how wase your day today? **  
**48 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** remebrer the new farm hand we got ? **  
**47 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** he's getinng beetter at taking care of the tomatoes  
47 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** so i might have mroe htime to talk to you at night :DDD**  
**47 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** his brown hair is aall messed uo now but he still stares at me with those unripe tomatoey eyes ):  
43 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **hello  
26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino wanted nothing more than to lie down and sleep. Today had been Feli's turn to take the night shift and in usual Lovino-style, he had lazed around his apartment and complained of a splitting headache to empty air. He was not interested in men with brown hair and green eyes.

**Anita F.C.:** LOVI (: **  
**25 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** are oyu okay? You sound tired **  
**25 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **good job, Einstein  
21 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** LOVI. **  
**20 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** DID YOU FORGET MY NAME?1**  
**20 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Oh god.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **no.  
16 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **ever heard of sarcasm?  
16 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** phew. **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** yes. But Francis says its lost on me ): **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** and I haven't found it yet. **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

…

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **I can tell .  
14 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Wait…'Francis'? Lovino felt very awake now.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **is this francis of yours a perverted Frenchman who molests any thing with two legs?  
14 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Franny is a fenchman but I;m not sure about the other part.  
12 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:**. But Gilly says that too ! so I guess it must be so **  
**11 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** you know Gilly right (: **  
**11 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** shes the one who talks in caps **  
**11 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** we trhee are the bestest best firneds in the whole wide world ! :D  
10 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** but you are still better because you're lovi . (:**  
**10 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **…Francis Bonnefoy Is Your Friend ?  
7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I just said that didn't I ? **  
**7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino sighed. So much for birds of a feather flocking together.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **fine then.  
6 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **tell the damned frenchie to stop molesting me.  
6 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** What? Franny does what? **  
**1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Oh fuck it. Lovino's ears were burning. He was _not _going to repeat that.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **y'know! you can just scroll u pand read it yourself!  
1 minute ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He got up crossly and fetched a tomato. Anita hadn't replied. He finished his tomato and went to get another one. She still hadn't replied.

Annoyed, but not knowing why, Lovino went to her Facebook profile, and very nearly spat out his tomato.

Under 'Recent Activity', Anita apparently had left a string of Posts on Francis' Wall, very recently so. Lovino scowled. Lucky that he wasn't the Frenchman's friend else his eyes would have died.

_What is that woman doing, talking to the perverted Frenchman instead of – wait, what? _Lovino nearly choked on his half-eaten tomato. _What was that, brain? _

He would have set about on another argument with his thoughts if he hadn't caught sight of yet another shocking thing: next to a little gray heart were the words "**In a relationship**". Taunting him, almost, because he had never found use for the Relationship Status option on his profile. Not that he'd broadcast the condition of his relationships to the world; it needed no reminding that Lovino Vargas was charming ladies at a drop of a hat.

Still, his mind ran through a series of phrases: 'So, you're in a relationship?' – too direct. 'Who's your boyfriend' – too obvious. 'You have a boyfriend?' – obviously, unless she was knocking up another woman. 'I bet you're dating the fucking wino-freak' – now he sounded like a jealous fuck.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **hey Anita I'm going to bed now.  
27 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** ah ah ah weait lovi ! **  
**24 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Francis says he'll never bother you again (: **  
**24 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **yeah right.  
22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I'm seriosu! I asked him nicely and he promised me (: **  
**20 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino felt his stomach clench. A stronger, more believable thought about bad tomatoes quickly brushed aside a quiet one of Anita finally reining her boyfriend in.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Okay okay. Good night.  
15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Good night love (: **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** AH I meant 'lovi"!**  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino could feel his headache coming back.

* * *

**A/N: **I hope it wasn't too bad. It seems so clichéd now T.T Now the count is **USUK: 6** _FrUK: 2 _ FrSey: 2  FrJoan: 1  
So. You have until chapter 10 to put in your two cents' worth. If you want to, that is(;

To** XD:** I _effin' _love you. It's a pity that I have only your pale gray countenance to look at ):


	9. Wednesday II

**A/N: **Hello! It's been two weeks, but here it is. I can't think of anything smart or funny to say here but today I made someone very important to me angry and upset so here: don't take people for granted.

Constructive criticism is still so very greatly appreciated!

Oh and, the weird formatting in Feli and Anita's conversation is supposed to mimick the Chat window on Facebook, but FF doesn't allow me to use spaces or tabs to move the time stamp to the side, boo. I tried to write Alfred and, as you will see, failed terribly at it. I'll try to get his personality down pat (pat down?) though!

Ps. I love you guys, honestly. I never expected to get above 50 reviews. You're all so sweet and encouraging and I'm so honoured that you've read and liked my story. I wish I could hug each one of you! Virtual hug Y/Y?

* * *

******Facebook Status . **Chapter Nine - Wednesday **__****{insufferable}**

* * *

"Bonjour everybody!" Francis announces, "You have now been graced with my presence!" and receives a mixture of greetings in return. His baby blue eyes scans the kitchen until he finds his target. Lovino bends over the mound of bread dough, kneading with strong, steady moves; and Francis cannot help smiling to himself. Gone are there death-rays and scowls, replaced with soft smiles and an intense expression. Yes, the man is a pretty sight when he is working. Still, Francis shudders at the memories of last night that come back – of Anita promising a fate worse than death should he ever lay hands on Lovino again.

But looking isn't touching, so Francis allows himself to grin and blow a kiss at Lovino, which the Italian swears at.

* * *

"What would you like to order?" Alfred's smile, if possible, grew wider at the sight of Alice in a waitress' uniform.

"Coffee please!" He said. Alice wrinkled her nose. "Or – or water."

"Water is for the feet, and coffee is undoubtedly inferior to coffee," Alice said contemptuously. She disliked this loud-mouthed telecommunications man with his stupid cowlick and insufferable I'll-save-you! attitude. "Would you like to try White Peony or Camomile tea, since it's late at night?"

Alfred stared at the waitress blankly for a few seconds. "How – how can you say that about _coffee_? Coffee is – is the drink of the gods! _Tea _is the one that's inferior."

Alice's mouth drew into a tight line. Memories of Innes and the carbon-water came to mind. "Pshaw. Coffee is like carbon water and disgusting!"

"I have half the mind to pour your tea down the toilet bowl!"

"Yes, do that, that I _will _believe you have half – only half – a mind!"

Other patrons were looking on with mixed interest and annoyance. Katyusha, sensing a full-blown argument in the near future, quickly interceded. "Alice, come here for a moment please!" The waitress gave Alfred one last look before marching off to see what Katyusha needed, brushing past Francis who was hurrying to her shell-shocked customer.

The busty woman was waiting for her at the counter. "Alice! I know it's nearly closing hours – but there's still people around and you can't go about insulting our guests," Katyusha was on the verge of crying. Alice sighed and muttered an apology. She was just so _bored_, sitting in the Manager's Office doing nothing, so she decided to be a waitress for a spin. Katyusha patted the bristly accountant and pushed her towards the dining floor again.

But all through the rest of the night, a niggling memory continued to try resurfacing in her mind. Something about sandboxes and people wanting to pour tea down sinks and toilet bowls. Alice crossly shoved her childhood memories down the chute once more, scowling at the telecommunications man at every chance she got. Trust Francis to go to such lengths as to hire someone to annoy her! What a pair of insufferable gits.

* * *

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **hello  
52 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Hello Lovi! **  
**48 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** how was oyur day today? **  
**48 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **It was fine thank you.  
45 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **except for that potato bperson.  
42 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** who?**  
**42 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Matt's girlfriend. He's always so busy with her and she's acts like his bodyguard or something.  
39 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Gilly? You mean?  
38 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I mean I have a firned who's dating someone called Mark .Or math or something.  
38 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Matt. MaTT. anyway. so because that silver-haired woman is always hanging around, matt and I cant have our cool manly chats.  
37 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **so much for 'bros before hoes'. Like that crazy woman is better than me  
37 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** Gilly's not a ho, Lovi. **  
**34 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino wasn't ever going to admit that he got a spine-tingling shiver from reading that comment. Because it wasn't cool and Lovino didn't do uncool.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Yah yah.  
30 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** dont worry lovi! I'll always be here for you! **  
**29 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

And he wasn't going to admit he felt his heart skip a beat at that, either.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **Rubbish!  
26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **You'll go off with your boyfriend into the insufferable sunset and leave me alone.  
26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Damn. What was wrong with him today? Barely ten seconds later, he deleted the post. Disaster averted. No one need know how insecure he was.

But miles and miles away, Anita had read the post. Not only read it, but processed it (albeit wrongly), and now she frowned.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **You have a boyfriend so stop saying things like that.  
23 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

What was Lovi talking about? Did he dislike what she'd said? Wasn't that that friends said to one another?

* * *

**Anita:** 12:02 AM  
FELI FELI! LOVI IS ACTING STRANGE):

**Anita:** 12:02 AM  
he's confusing me DD:

**Feliciano: **12:03 AM  
wha what?

**Anita:** 12:03 AM  
i said that i'll always be there for him  
**Anita:** 12:03 AM  
and trhen hesays I should stop sayig things  
like that hbecaus ialreayd have a boyffirned

**Feliciano: **12:05 AM  
you said that? so sweet of you, Anini~

**Feliciano: **12:05 AM  
anita! How does Lovi know you ahve a  
boyfriend?

**Feliciano: **12:07 AM  
Lovi is probablky just jealous haha!

**Anita:** 12:10 AM  
Jealous? Why would Lovi be jealous?

**Feliciano: **12:12 AM  
You can prolong his misery by making him  
even more jealous

**Feliciano: **12:17 AM  
or you can be nice and kind and explain  
it all to Lovi.

**Feliciano: **12:17 AM  
I vote the first part :D

**Anita:** 12:20 AM  
I CAN'T DO THAT! YOU KNOW I CANNOT.

* * *

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **so. Your boyfriend. What's he like?  
26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** you want to know ?**  
**26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** why?**  
**26 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **so. so I know what sort of idiot is besotted with you.  
22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** besotted? **  
**22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **y'know. infatuated.  
22 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** …?**  
**21 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **…in love. okay . in love with you.  
16 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C: **oooh lovi! **  
**16 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** well. **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** he has bronw hair **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **brown? Not yellow?  
12 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** nope nope! Brown, unless he dyed it (: **  
**10 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

_Couldn't be Francis, then_, thought Lovino. Since the Frenchman's curled hair, which he bragged about and combed in the bathroom, was very much golden indeed.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **eye colour? what does he do?  
10 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** he's got eyes like tomato leaves! :D **  
**9 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **leaves?  
9 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Green! So Francis is ruled out entirely!

**Anita F.C.:** an then he workds in the kichen! **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** very good cehf he is! **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** I want to try his food some time! **  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** he looks so serious when he's in the ktichn! aaah my heart, be stil **  
**4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Lovino cringed at the post. That was gross. Very gross. He needed a tomato, ASAP.

* * *

**Anita:** 12:21 AM  
FELI FELI FELI. LOVI IS ASAKING ME QUETIONS.

**Feliciano: **12:22 AM  
I can see, Anita!

**Feliciano: **12:24 AM  
Heehee! You are very sneaky :D

**Anita: **12:29 AM  
sneaky?

**Feliciano: **12:32 AM  
Ah enver mind. Anyway. lovi is probably just  
tryig to finger out who your boyfriend ia!

**Anita: **12:38 AM  
doesn't he already nkow…?

**Feliciano: **12:42 AM  
just wait~

**Feliciano: **12:45 AM  
actually…

**Feliciano: **12:46 AM  
maybe you have to be more obvious! Lovi is  
not very experienced after all (: and he's  
quite dense too :DDD

* * *

**Anita F.C.:** lovi lovi lovi ~**  
**24 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **what.  
16 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** you seem pretty interested in my boyfiend(: **  
**15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **no  
15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **not at all.  
15 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** so! I'lll introduce you to my boyfierend! Okay! **  
**14 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Anita F.C.:** but you muse promuist no to freak out or run away or throw pasta doigh around ! **  
**14 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **did your brain just spontaneously combust?  
10 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

The fucking pasta dough. He knew Francis' attitude at work had been a little strange – less touchy feely and more sly smirks and suggestive eyebrow waggling – and it probably was the result of Anita. He was grateful, but he'd never admit it. He wouldn't admit he was curious about Anita's boyfriend, either.

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **I don't want to see your boyfriend anyway. It's none of my business and I don't care who he is. So there.  
4 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

Anita sighed. Lovino could be so clueless sometimes! She regarded the jellybean jar that stood tall on her table. It was almost filled to the top with money. Hopefully it'd be enough.

"Tomorrow I'll go talk to Boss! And then after that…"

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **I'm sleepy  
7 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

He said that just to see if Anita would say something absurd. But her almost-normal reply unnerves him.

**Anita F.C.:** good night then, Lovi **  
**5 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

**Lovino Fucking Vargas: **good night.  
2 minutes ago · Like · Comment · See Wall-to-Wall

And he tells himself he is stupid. Stupid for trusting Anita's words. Stupid for thinking someone like Anita would be single. Stupider, even, for feeling that horrible pang in his chest.

* * *

**A/N: **There you go. I hope you liked it. Nearly two thousand words. Haha. It was fun writing this. Because plot development, no matter how small or crackish, is still fun to write. And so it prissy Roma. Haha. 28 more days! Until the torment begins. But 48 more days until I'm FREE. I. Cannot. Wait.


End file.
